No Magic Joke

 

A magician was performing a magic show before a crowd of kids. He reached into his hat and pulled out a rabbit. "A rabbit!" the magician exclaimed.

"Big deal," a kid boos. "You got a rabbit cage under the table and a hole in the bottom of your hat!" 

The magician frowned. "Okay, smarty pants, for my next trick I will saw someone in half." 

The magician puts his assistant into a long wooden box and saws her in half. "She's sawed in half but still alive!" 

"Big deal," the same kid boos. "The legs on the other end are fake!"

All the other kids laugh.

The magician frowns again. "Okay, Mr. Know-It-All, for my next trick I will turn my scarf into a dove!"

He throws a scarf into the air. White smoke explodes. A pigeon flies out of the smoke. 

"Big deal," the kid boos. "You had a dove in your jacket! You let it out when the smoke appeared!"

The magician reached his limit. "Okay, kid, for my next trick I'm going to make you vanish."

"Oh, I'm so scared," the kid laughed. "Hit me with your best shot!"

The magician reached into his pocket and pulled out a cellphone. He called the cops. "Hello, police, I have a kid who sneaked into my show without paying."

The kid gulped and vanished faster than a flash of lightning. The magician took a bow. "That was my best trick all day, and it didn't even require any magic!"